I would have to say that sometimes being needy and clingy is not without reason. Some people get married because they found someone who “fits” the requirements but without passion for their spouse. I think in my case that early on in my relationship my wife and I were on an equal footing with respect to attraction. However, I could be a jerk often. Not a jerk out of hubris but out of fear and in retaliation for hurts. Over time my wife’s heart hardened and we became more like friends with benefits. She found it hard to like me very much sometimes. She is a great woman and still did things out of duty despite my problems. Having a problem with porn did not help either but I used it to some degree as an escape. One day I woke up and gained vision as to my behavior and its effects on my relationship. I have dug quite a hole for myself. Now, not only do I not get the love I want but I have recently made it even harder for her to love my like I want to be loved. I have, though, learned a lot about myself and learned to make changes. No more controlling or manipulating. No more cutting sarcasm or making fun of things about her that I don’t like. I have set you free my darling I just hope your heart comes back to me soon.