My wife and I went through several years as adversaries.  I saw her as blocking me from getting what I wanted and causing me to be a second class citizen.  This is a terrible place to be.  Every time that she asked me to do something I was resistant and showed it.  She dreaded asking me to do anything.  At the time I was also super low on energy and quite fatigued all the time.  I have since changed my attitude.  I have changed back my thinking to again view us as a team.  We are on the same side.  If I can help in anyway I will do it without expectations.  This is only possible because my wife is a person I can trust.  She will not take advantage of me and will not expect me to do way more than my fair share of work.  If your spouse expects you to do it all or you feel like you do way too much you need to make a change.  Obviously things are never 50/50 and for some periods one of you will have to do more.  I can be lazy sometimes but not often.  Being married to a lazy person must be tough.  Anyway, view any conflict as either you both win or you both lose.


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